The Mad Tea Party (Alice version)

After walking through the woods, Alice had finally found a house which she believes could be the Fox Hatter and the March Cat's house.

"How very curious!" Alice cried.

She walked to the gate that was the side of the house to see who could be singing. She saw that there was a long table, with a pink tablecloth and many and many teapots and cups and many more things. Sitting around the table were two animals that seem happy.

They were Honest John (a fox with red fur, wearing an old top hat, a green suit, and a blue cloak. He also carries a cane) and Gideon (a cat with brown fur, a cream muzzle, and blue eyes, wearing a gray top hat, a dirty yellow trench coat, purple pants, and white opera gloves. He also carries a cane), and right now, they were singing a song, while steam was coming out of the teapots, playing along with the song.

Gideon: ...to us.

A very know what day today is tea forget of us?

Honest John: A very merry unbirthday...

Gideon: A very merry unbirthday...

Honest John and Gideon: A very merry unbirthday to uuuuuussss...

As a solo was taking place, Alice looked from behind the chair and saw the teapots dancing around. She tried to look at the guests of the party, but the steam was in the way. So she looked down through the teapots.

Gideon: Aaaaa... very Merry Unbirthday to me.

Honest John: To who?

Gideon: To me!

Honest John: Oh you!

Gideon: A very merry unbirthday to you.

Honest John: Who me?

Gideon: Yes you!

Honest John: Oh me!

Gideon: Let's all congratulate us

With another cup of tea.

Avery merry unbirthday...

Toooooooooooooooooooooooo... Yooooooouuuuuuuu...

When the song was over, Alice applauded. Honest John and Gideon noticed that Alice was there. They sprang from their chairs and jumped from chair to chair over to her, saying, "No room, no room, no room!"

Alice sat down on a chair in confusion and protested, "But I thought there was plenty of room."

"Ah, but it's very rude to sit down without being invited!" Gideon said.

Honest John said in agreement, "I say it's rude! It's very, very rude indeed. Hah!"

A white kitten named Marie, who was wearing a pink bowtie on her head and a pink bow on her neck, peeked out of a teapot and repeated in a sleepy voice, "Very, very, very rude indeed..."

Alice figures that they had a point, so she apologized, saying, "Oh, I'm sorry, but I did enjoy your singing and I wondered if you could tell me..."

Gideon jumped on the arm of the chair Alice was sitting on and said, "You enjoyed our singing?"

"Oh, what a delightful child!" Honest John said. "Hah! I'm so excited, we never get compliments! You must have a cup of tea."

"Ah, yes indeed!" Gideon agreed. "You must have a cup of tea!"

"That would be very nice. And I'm sorry that I interrupted your birthday party." Alice said, as Gideon gave her the tea. "Thank you."

Gideon then grabbed the tea back and said, "Birthday? Ha, ha, ha! My dear child, this is not a birthday party."

Then Honest John picked up a teapot and poured tea, as he said, "Of course not. He-he-he. This is an unbirthday party."

"Unbirthday?" Alice said in confusion. "Why, I'm sorry, but I don't quite understand."

"It's very simple," Gideon explained. "See, thirty days have Sept-no, when..." Gideon scratched his head. "An unbirthday, if you have a birthday, then you..." Then he laughed how hard it is to explain. "She doesn't know what an unbirthday is!"

Honest John replied, "How silly... Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha... Ah-hum..." He coughed a little and used a tea pot to spray some steam to clear his throat. "I shall elucidate!"

Gideon used a spoon as a baton to cinduct the tea pots into music.

Honest John: Now statistics pove, prove that you've one birthday.

Gideon: Imagine, just one birthday every year.

Honest John: Ahhh, but there are over 364 unbirthdays.

Gideon: Precisely, why we're gathered here to cheer!

And, since today wasn't Alice's birthday, Alice got up and said, "Well, then today is my unbirthday too."

"It is?" said Gideon, looking surprised.

'What a small world this is." Honest John commented.

"In that case..." Gideon said, before he and Honest John jumped out of their seats and started to dance around Alice.

Gideon: A very merry unbirthday.

Alice: To me?

Honest John: To you.

He takes off his hat to present a big pink cake trim in white with a burning candle on top.

Gideon: A very merry unbirthday.

Alice: For me?

Honest John: For you.

Honest John gives Alice the cake.

Now blow out the candle out, my dear,

And make your wish come true!

He picks some icing up with his finger and licked it off, with a laugh.

Alice blew the candle out and it started to flare like a fuse. In fact, to Alice's surprise, the cake launched to the sky like a skyrocket.

Honest John and Gideon: A very merry unbirthday to you...

The cake exploded with many pretty colors like fireworks, much to Alice's delight. Out of the smoke, descended Marie with a tiny umbrella tied on her.

Marie: Twinkle, twinkle little bat

How I wonder what your at

Up above the world you fly

Like a tea tray in the sky...

Marie landed in a tea pot and Honest John closed the pot.

Alice clapped and said, "Oh, that was lovely!"