All The Wrong Choices: Stealing The Bombinating Beast

(This is the first All the Wrong Questions, but from Ellington's point-of-view instead of Snicket's. I hope that I am not breaking the rules by doing this; I didn't find anything that said I couldn't write this, but I am not sure. Also, for copyright reasons, the parts with Snicket will not be the exact dialogue for the series)

TO: Pecuchet Bellerophon

FROM: EF

FILE UNDER: Stain'd-by-the-sea, accounts of; theft, stealing; VFD; abandoned coffee house; Bombinating Beast; phonograph; et cetera !a/4

CC: None

Chapter One
There was a man, and there was statue, and there was a theft. I was the one who was responsible for the theft, and I stole the statue. I did it because the man asked me too, and I thought that if I did what I did what he asked me too I would be able to rescue my father. I was almost fourteen and I was wrong. I should have made the choice to help the young man who fell into my life, instead I made the wrong choice. Four wrong choices, more or less. And this is the account of the first.

It was another morning just like any other the past six months, which doesn't mean it was nice, just the oppisite, really. When I say this was an average morning, what I really mean is it was terrible. But I was getting used to it. The only difference, I thought, from this morning and any other was that today I was in the city, where I had only been for three days. The city was busy, strange place and I didn't like it. Of course, I wasn't there on vacation. I was there to find my father. About six months before that morning, I had lost my father, and before I could do anything--call the police, look for him, try to get in touch with anyone, runaway, pack up my things, anything. I had gotten a call on my father's house phone from a sinister villain saying I would never see my father again. It was threat, I took it as a challage. I packed up my things and tried to find him, and I had ended up here in the city. Today, I was hiding in a phonebooth, I was given a message that I should, and I had gotten the message that past night. I was waiting for the phone to ring, and I was hoping nobody needed to make any calls anytime soon, for it felt like I was never going to get the call.

Finally, it rang. I slipped some of my last few coins into the phone and answered it. "Hello?" I said, I shouldn't have answered. I never should have answered. If I hadn't answered that phone, I wouldn't be where I was now. I wouldn't have ever come to the town where I spent the duration of these accounts, I am not sure where I would be, but it would be better then where I was now. I would never have met the young man who didn't drink coffee, never saw the statue with eyes even greener then my own, and more importantly I never would have stolen it, I never would have impersonated the brilliant chemist, gotten arrested for the frist time, escaped from prison, disguised myself as a schoolchild, helped destory a library, gotten arrested again, been cellmates with that library's only librarian, gotten on that train, been released from prison....or anything else. None of that would have happened if I hadn't answered that phone.

I should have thought before answering, I should have thought about how it would change my life, I should have thought about the risk I was taking and wrong things I might end up doing. I should have thought about why the villain would call me, and about weather or not I would be able to trick him, I should have thought about motivated him to do the things he did, and about who else would have done the same, I should have thought about it all. I should made the choice to not answer the phone and go back to Killdeer Feilds, where I used to live, and wait until I was old enough to get a job, and then gotten one. Out of all the wrong choices I made in these accounts, this was the first, and now thinking back on it, it very could have been the biggest. But I didn't think before I answered the phone, if I had, even for a split second, I wouldn't have answered. Of course, there was no way I would know just what would happen, but I would have know it be back. But I answered. And there was no turning back.

"Ellington!" Said the voice I had heard everyday of my life until six months ago, and then hadn't heard for half a year. "Ellington, is that you?" said my father, for it was him, of course it was him.

"Yes," I said, my heart racing. "Father, are you alright?" I asked, I wanted to ask "Where are you?" but unlike a young acquaintance of mine, I almost never asked the wrong questions.

"I'm fine, Ellington." My father said. "But what about you? Are you alright? Are you still at Killdeer Fields?"

"No," I replied, "I left their ages ago, I am in the city now." I shouldn't have told him my location, it was a generally the wrong choice to tell someone who is kiddnapped where you are, becauce the kiddnapper is almost always listening to the conversation. It is even worse to tell a kiddnapper you location. However, even though it was the wrong choice, it was one that had no impact on my life.

"You are in luck, then." Said my father, without bothering to ask how I got there. "The place I am being held is only about six hours away by car. Or at least, it was when I was there."

"You hate cities," I reminded him. "Because they are bad for animals. Where were you doing here?" My father, Armstrong Feint, did hate cities, because he loved animals and nature, and cities destoryed animal's homes. He never took me to the city for the same reason, I had always wanted to go, but now that I was there I knew what he meant. My father lost many jobs because he refused to go anywhere that wasn't a small town, even just for a couple of days.

"Hangfire knows." father said, "that is why he kept me there for a while."

"Your kiddnapper? Why does he call himself Hangfire?" I asked, I didn't for sure that was the kiddnapper's name, but that would make sense, the only other person aside from a sinister villain who would choose a name like 'Hangfire' to go by would be the leader of a rockband, and I didn't think a rockband leader would have any reason to kiddnap my father.