Jealousy Issues

Enterprise had put up with a lot throughout her incarnations, particularly concerning her captain's choices in partners.

She'd dealt with Archer's fascination with various members of the crew, particularly T'Pol. She'd dealt with Harrison's irritating tendency to flirt with his bridge staff. She'd even dealt with Kirk's sometimes, no scratch that, always shocking ability to fuck anything with genitalia.

So, she couldn't understand why she was feeling something she could only interpret as "envy" which was directed at the Department Head of Stellercartography. Lt. Commander Nella Darien was good at her job. In fact she was great at it. It was what else she was good at.

Though many had tried, she'd been the first to successfully woo the captain.

Enterprise traded her snarl for a snort of disgust. On the bridge, Picard heard her.

"Something bothering you?" He asked.

"No sir. I apologize." She replied quickly. Perhaps a little too quickly.

"Counselor?" Picard asked the half-Betazid sitting next to him.

"She's angry about something. But is also confused about it." Troi replied.

Enterprise growled. "I can hear you, you know." She hissed.

"You wouldn't need to hear this if you'd tell us what's bothering you." Picard replied.

Enterprise traded her smart ass reply for a good snarl as, a second later, Darien herself stepped on the bridge.

Troi barely hid her smirk as she picked up on the starship's thoughts. They were along the lines of certain four-lettered vocabulary from early Earth languages that would've impressed even the most hardcore sailor of that era. As the captain left the bridge, Riker turned to her.

"What do you find amusing?" He asked.

"I believe I know what is bothering Enterprise." She said.

"Please don't tell the captain!" Enterprise wailed. She was already embarrassed enough thank you. Her saucer turned red at the very thought of telling Picard she was in love with him!

"I won't, if you will." Troi answered ominously and Enterprise groaned. So much for luck!...

...

"Captain, this is a very unwise choice you're making!"

Picard groaned. Since he'd confirmed his relationship with Darien, his ship had pestered him nonstop. Enterprise was insisting that the Head of Stellercartography was not as able a woman as he assumed.

It was obvious she didn't approve but Picard never recalled having asked for her opinion. Thus, he resolved to merely listen to her complaints and not rise to the challenge they presented. But it'd been 6 hours, 6 hours 43 minutes and 10.57 seconds according to the always accurate Data, since Enterprise began. He was beginning to lose patience.

"Irritating, loud-mouthed, opinionated, using your relationship to gain special favors..."

"Are you quite finished?" Picard sighed.

She hissed through her teeth. No, she was not finished. Not by a long shot! She had many more things she wished to say about Darien, most four-lettered and all unpleasant but she could see she was not making any progress in convincing Picard of her opinion. She'd only succeeded in annoying him further!

"Yes sir!" She growled grudgingly. "Quite done!"

Oh yes! She was quite done with her captain's ignorance. It was clear to her he did not feel the same. Why bother saying anything now? As the starship fumed, her anger slowly faded away, being replaced by a curious empty sensation that she could only describe as loneliness...

...

Unlike what her crew could see through her sensors, Enterprise could see all that occurred on the planet's firestorm ravaged surface.

As the storm closed in, the people on the ground, her crew rigging the defensive thermodeflectors, were at grave risk. And they included Darien.

A sudden surge of emotion overtook the young starship. For once it was not envy as usually was the case whenever her thoughts turned to the Lt. Commander. It was fear. Pure, primal fear.

She could've just left Darien there. Let the firestorm consume her as she rescued all the others. Maybe stage a transporter accident. But that would be wrong! And Picard would never forgive her, nor himself, if Darien died.

The choice had been made and with reflexes faster than any human at her controls could beat, she'd disengaged her orbit, flown through the planet's atmosphere, burning through her shields and blistering her skin, before landing hard on the surface.

The firestorm was upon her just as she shielded the Stellercartography crew with her bulk. It burned! It burned unlike anything she'd ever felt before!

Windows cracked under the pressure and she used her draining energy reserves to maintain her hulls' integrity. For her crew's sake. She could take these conditions, they could not.

It was three long hours before the storm finally passed and when it did, Enterprise was left in a sprawled heap, blisters breaking open on over a third of her body, forming a pool of blue blood around her.

Her eyes were closed and her breaths came in short, painful wheezes that hurt to listen to. Picard was stunned at the sight. There were always risks with their jobs but he'd never imagined his ship would deliberately put herself in the line of fire to protect him, to protect all of them. Not like this!

"Captain?"

The voice of Deanna Troy interrupted his thoughts. "Yes, Councilor what is it?" He asked.

"I have some information for you, regarding Enterprise."

"Go on." He ordered, straightening in his chair as he gave her his full attention. Maybe she had an explanation for what his ship had done.

"When we were en route to this planet, I sensed an outburst of emotion from Enterprise. She was upset about something. It wasn't the first time I sensed this from her. In fact, these outbursts began close to the same time you started seeing Lt. Commander Darien." Troi replied.

"Wha- you think my starship is  jealous, counselor?" Picard hardly dare ask.

"I promised her my silence. If she is jealous, and I am not saying she is, it is her place to tell you her feelings."

After she had gone, Picard was left to his thoughts. The more he considered it, the more convinced he was that Enterprise may have been right all along. Jealous or not, his starship had tried to convince him of the danger in having a relationship with Darien. And, considering his mental state shortly after the incident in which he believed Darien to be dead, he knew she was right to. It was his fault he didn't listen. His fault...

Enterprise had known Darien would die if she hadn't interfered. She knew what her death would do to him.

His own starship, the thing, the woman that meant more to him than anyone else, the secret love of his heart, had very nearly died saving a woman she despised. All to protect him.

Darien would have to be transferred. That much was clear. She could not remain aboard without jeopardizing his ability to command. And if it wasn't for his foolish impulses, he never would've jeopardized that command!

Looking at his starship from the ground gave him a rare perspective. He could see the charred patches of her hull, her darkened nacelles, her bloody, blistered lips through which shallow uneven breaths escaped. She'd nearly died, pulling that stunt. She still could die! Dr. Crusher was doing everything she could do to prevent that.

Placing a hand on his ship's nose, he allowed her hot breath to warm his fingers. The guilt as he looked at her overwhelmed him.

He could only whisper while keeping his voice under control. "What have I done?" He whispered.

"God, what have I done..."